Holding on and Letting Go.

Well, I am officially all moved out of my parent's house and on my own. My mom kept on telling me that I have my big girl pants on now :). I dropped my mom off at the Provo airport this morning, it was sad. I will miss her.

When I started packing everything to head back out to Provo I was amazed at how much stuff I packed! I could have sworn I left Provo with just a suitcase and Henry. My car was jam packed by the time we left.  My cousin, Lindsay, let me borrow her bike and I am SO excited to ride it to work everyday. It is so cute! But it was definitely interesting packing a bike, I have never done that before.

After I had everything packed and ready to go my mom and I headed off to Vegas! Vegas can be so much fun if you plan your vacation well. There may be a lot of trashy things/people in Vegas, but there is also a lot of amazing entertainment and cool things to see. I like staying in Vegas! Thankyouverymuch.
 

We went to the Mandalay Bay Shark Reef. Nothing will really be able to top the Monterey Bay Aquarium, but my mom and I had a lot of fun looking at the different exhibits. This guy reminded me of the fish on Sword of the Stone. There was another one that was longer that looked like the mean one on Sword of the Stone, but I couldn't get a good picture of him.  


We made friends with this guy! He was playing peekaboo with us and would only swim between my mom and I before hiding again. We moved around to watch how he would react. He was so cute! I am such a sucker for animals...even fish apparently.


 As we were walking through the casino I saw the cutest old ladies. They were hilarious. HUGE hair, matching sparkly sandals, spandex pants and enough makeup to last a year! But, they looked like great friends.  I loved it. They found what they like to do, they wear what they want to wear and they just seemed like they were oblivious to what the world thought of them.

((I wasn't brave enough to sneak another picture...the bartender kept on givin me the stink eye))

We went and saw the lions at the MGM Grand. They were cute and they looked so soft! I told my mom I wanted one or at least wanted to play with one....she wasn't too fond of the idea!


And then of course we went to see a show...

:) just joking!

We drove out to Utah without any problems and got here just in time to eat some dinner and watch the COOLEST lightning storm.  I love storms, that's something I really miss living in California. I love when it is warm outside and the rain is refreshing. The smell was to die for and I just stood outside for a few minutes because it felt so good!

There is nothing better than snoogling up with someone and a good blanket when you can hear the storm outside.  The wind was blowing, the lightning was flashing and the thunder was loud! The grandeur of nature in storms is so humbling.

I thought this move was going to be a lot harder than it was. I haven't even cried once in almost 10 days. Not even a little cry. I almost felt like I should cry last week, I told my mom I felt guilty for not crying and she just raised her eyebrows and told me that I should never feel guilty for not crying about all of this.

I was able to get everything returned and settled from the engagement, FINALLY! It felt so so good to have it all done.  A friend came with me to return the last thing I needed to return and after it was all said and done I couldn't help doing my own little happy dance and turning around and giving him a huge hug. He picked me up twirled me around set me and I continued my embarrassing dance all the way to the car. 

We went to Sonic to celebrate. Can I tell you how wonderful it is to have a Diet Dr. Pepper with vanilla and pebbled ice? Thank you Sonic. I will be frequenting you often in the next month!
I can't wait to drink Diet Coke again. I couldn't believe that I didn't drink it this past month. If I could make it through this summer without drinking Diet Coke, I definitely have the will power to not drink it.
I just realized that this drink is on one of my to-do lists. I love lists. 
Moved into my new apartment and it is gorgeous! I'm still trying to figure out where everything is going to fit...that will be a little challenging.  But, I think all I need is a trip up to Ikea for some good organizational tools. Cross your fingers! Speaking of fingers, I ripped a HUGE chunk of my nail out trying to put my key onto my key ring.  I can be so dumb sometimes, it is really incredible.

My roommates are gorgeous and have been nothing but kind. WHAT A BLESSING! I was so worried about moving into a place with roommates again but everything just fell into place and it was/is a monstrous relief.

And can I tell you how nice it is to be paying less than half of what I was preparing and budgeting to pay in rent all summer!? It's marvelous. 

Today was a stressful day, I woke up and have not stopped going since 6:30am this morning. My LSAT prep class was very overwhelming. I'm torn because I know that in order to get the score that I need this next month I need to be best friends with my LSAT book, but I don't want to! 

It is just frustrating because I am just finally starting to feel back to normal. I wasted so much time this summer allowing my view of myself to be warped and damaged by people that had no problem telling me I was not good enough for them. I tried so hard to please other people and change to make them happy and to receive the affirmation, love and approval that I was desperately looking for.
It has felt so good to spend these last few weeks with people that love me and assure me that I am enough! I will be the first one to tell you that I am far from perfect but I'm trying real hard to lead a good life. That is the best I can do and that is enough. Now I just want to go on lots of adventures and spend time with all of my friends and family, I don't feel like studying! 

 


I vehemently agree with this and I can already think of a lot of excuses to not study for the LSAT....hmpf.

Oh my gosh, I almost forgot PTL Thursday!!!! PTL Thursdays will be happening weekly for the rest of my life. If you would like to join the PTL club, let me know. You won't regret it.
Ever since I read Walden I have loved Henry David Thoreau. He said,
"Never look back unless you are planning on going that way"

Cheers! Thanks Henry, good 'ol buddy 'ol pal.

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